Thursday, June 07, 2007 11:52 PM
♥
woke up super late today.
didnt reali study for my test tmr.
oni managed to read thru sum cases,
n identify the parts of a whole.
was 5.45pm when i last saw the clock.
realised i will b late if i still dun go bathe.
met min, den went JP together.
bananas gathering today, quite sum stuffs happened.
went pizza hut to eat dinner.
n tads all tad happened.i dun understand wad is happening. it seems as though i no longer noe u. im at a lost of wad i can do. it's nt as if u r the oni one gg thru all the hard tyms. at least we r here to help u. it's u hu doesnt wan to open ur hart to us. dun blame us for tad. i tried, tried my best to help u. but all u do was to close ur ears to my advice. y ask for dem when u dun even wan to heed dem?! hais. i duno wad i can do animore. i hve my own troubles. if u xpect me to tink for u, den i tink u shuld oso tink for me. i cant b wif u 24/7. im nt ur babysitter. i understand tad u r gg thru a veh tough tym n nid alot of support. but hu noes wad i've went thru?! hu was there to help n support me when i nided dem?! hu noes hw many slpless nite i've spent tinking bout dem? hu noes hw many tyms i've cried for 1 minor ting tad happened? hu noes hw i woke up in fright, fearing the new day tad lies ahead for me. im oredi at the verge of brking dwn, n yet there's still more unsolved problems for me. hu noes hw i dreaded fights, at hm or outside? everyone seems to tink im fine. but hu reali noes tad im acherli nt fine at all? happiness is sumting tad neva stays for me. for everytym the laughter ends, emptiness filled my hart n mind. nobody reali understands me. i put up a strong fight to all the troubles tad arise. carrying smiles n laughter everyday, but hu noes hw i reali feel deep inside? i reali wan to help. but wad more can i do? im at a lost. so lost tad i cant even find a way out. it seems lyk im in a veh dark n long pathway, wif no light n endless road for me. i dun wanna feel tis way. but hu reali noes wad i wan? everyone tinks im strong. but deep inside, im as fragile as a thin piece of glass. my hart is dead. i no longer feels. kill me wif a stab. n end my misery instead.
